Thursday, September 27, 2007

S-CHIP Follies, or, Mommy Is A Democrat Because Republicans Hate Children

Heard something today that truly brought to mind the term schadenfruede. Mitch McConnell (R-Lackey), confronted with a bill that would radically choose to fully fund the State Children's Health Insurance Program (S-CHIP), was quoted today on NPR: "Democrats are counting down the hours, so they can tee up the election ads, saying Republicans don't like kids."

To which I reply:

You are 100% Fucking-A right, Skippy. Even if you concede that Republicans opposed to S-CHIP are opposed for some deep philosophical reason, such as chronic diseases will toughen up the coming generations, it's still the case that you're getting it shoved back down your throat. Why? Oh, let me think...is it for Willie Horton? Maybe it's "Al Gore claims he invented the Internet," or maybe it's turning triple-amputee Max Cleland into some kind of wimp because he didn't support the Deciderator in Iraq.

If you're getting shoved down your fucking throat that you hate kids, it's only sweet sweet karmic payback for the decades of sludge, muck, fecal matter and slime tossed by Repub after Repub. He who lives by the false innuendo, dies by the false innuendo, motherfucker.

There seems to be some kind of trope running through the Republican party, that despite running the country into the ground while enjoying total control of the Legislative, Judicial and of course the Dictatorial...I mean, Executive...branches, somehow they're PUT UPON. I was once told by someone (a Bush Supporter) that she felt hostility directed towards her for her sign supporting Bush in her lawn. A lawn in Mequon, WI.* For a moment, I simply couldn't understand what the FUCK she was talking about.

Slowly, it dawned on me. Other encounters with known Republicans (don't worry I have a list...when the Revolution comes Guantanamo will be FULL, baby) suddenly made sense. Republicans think they're being unacceptably put upon when even ONE person around them disagrees, no matter how politely.

Seriously. Somewhere in the conservative mindset lies the equation "Having to look at a Democratic candidate's placard"="Rosa Parks being told to go to the back of the bus."

It's why, despite controlling EVERY aspect of business, and government most of the time, and the military all of the time, they find it INTOLERABLE that large universities are havens of liberal control. They don't even NOTICE that they control all the other levers of society. The fact that there is even the SLIGHTEST dissent drives them bugnuts.

So, I say to Mitch: Cry me a fucking river, asshole. I hope the Democrats run an ad every week in every district that has a congresscritter that voted against S-CHIP, and every state with a Senator that voted against it (actually a short list, since the Senate, unlike the House, actually has the votes to override Bushie's veto) from now until election day. Just so I NEVER have to hear, "Children are so precious to us that we must insert your favorite totalitarian impulse here," out of one of their PIEHOLES ever again.

*For those of you who've never lived in Milwaukee, Mequon is an affluent suburb, north of Milwaukee. There are few places more Republican than Mequon. Affirmative action consists of busing in kids who don't have their own trust funds, so their betters can see them occasionally. The only place more Republican in Milwaukee than Mequon, is Waukesha. And that's only because Waukesha adds the religiously fanatic to the overwhelmingly self-absorbed.

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