Why Obama?

It's going to come as no surprise to those who read this blog (and thus know me) that I am an Obama supporter. I am, in fact, fairly enthusiastic about him, which bodes well for him should he get the nomination. I have a fairly good track record when it comes to victory IF the DemocratIC (that's Democratic, NOT Democrat, you asshole conservatives) Party nominates the guy I liked in the primaries. I liked Carter, I liked Clinton and I like Obama. When the guy I like DOESN'T get the nod, the Dems lose.

So, victory likelihood aside, why Obama? Why not (Hillary) Clinton? I liked her husband, even if, on a personal note, he never got past being the Band Geek, and thus when some free pussy threw itself at him, he had no discernible self-control at a time when he KNEW (not suspected, KNEW) they really were out to get him? I liked him for the reasons he was a pretty decent President; when it came to policy he wasn't doctrinaire, he had a great campaign presence which was sorely needed in the post-Reagan era, his basic ideas about where the country needed to go were spot on. And the country delivered in spades. Longest peacetime expansion. Huge wealth engine. A rising tide that actually DID lift all the boats. That latter is, perhaps, the main reason the right hated him so. He did everything they said would be disastrous and he succeeded. I don't think they ever forgave him for not putting the economy in the tank like they said he would.

But I'm NOT supporting his wife. Why? Maybe she leaves me cold. I dunno. I do know this. After the campaign between Kerry and Bush in 2004 I realized something.

I'm sick and fucking TIRED of the baby boomers dragging our collective asses into their god damned psychodrama. EVERYTHING revolves around who went to Vietnam and who didn't. Who supported the war and who didn't. Who was a dirty fucking hippie and who was a drunken fucking fratboy.

I'm NOT a damned boomer, but thanks to these self-absorbed assholes and their constant need to fight and refight and re-refight the central conflict of the sixties (counter-culture vs. button-down) in all it's multifaceted glory, I get to watch, get sucked in, have to deal with their inability to MOVE THE FUCK ON. That's the change Obama offers. It's the fucking subtext of ALL his speeches, "Aren't you sick and tired of all this hyper-partisan warfare fucking it all up for the rest of us?"

Yes, yes, I am. I realize that the culture war won't end, ever, because every generation has its issues. Personally, if a cancer plague killed every single registered Republican painfully over the next month, I wouldn't shed a tear. But at least that's MY issue. Not some aging Aquarian's need to prove HE (or she) was RIGHT about; drugs, Vietnam, the need to "Burn Baby Burn", sell out and move up, or any of that shit. At least my issues are my issues, not the belted up, bitter baggage of someone who's old enough to have seen the premiere of "Hair".

THAT'S why Obama. Clinton, Bush, they're all just fucking boomers, trying to make us live in the world they want to make. Fuck that. This is the dawning of the Age Of Shut The Fuck Up And Finally Grow Old Gracefully, Or ELSE! Vote for someone who doesn't care what you did in '68. Since what I did in '68 was mainly refuse to take my afternoon nap, I've had it with you people.

Friday Random Thoughts

Much blogging has not been occurring because the Wee Pedant gets up in the middle of the night selfishly insisting on feedings and then processing said feedings directly into diapers. Even with Lovely and Talented Mrs. Pedant running interference during the week, I lack energy.

But instead of ONE long and scatological diatribe, you get many. Shall we start?

Turns out the White House, in direct contravention of laws requiring them to maintain records of emails (and as they've been told now, not to circumvent oversight by using RNC email accounts) has been destroying (or rather "recycling") email tapes and thousands and thousands of emails by writing over the tapes. Spokesman Tony Fratto (and is there ANYone who sounds more like a character from The Godfather available?) has replied, "We have no reason to believe that there is any data missing at all [from White House computer servers], and we've certainly found no evidence of any data missing." Of course you can't find evidence that data is missing, you pinhead. You fucking DESTROYED it!

In other words, since we destroyed the data, you can't prove we destroyed the data, therefore we didn't destroy the data. Shorter White House? Succeeding at it is a valid defense for obstruction of justice.

What else have I been following? That whole Navy warship/Highly threatening Iranian speedboats controversy. The Bushies tried to get their war on over this until...well, read for yourself. Apparently Iran's protestations of innocence may be, ummmm, accurate. And Idiot Manchild's characterization of the incident as unusual and provocative? Not so much.

What's my point? It used to be in incidents like this you knew who to believe. The US had the straight scoop and the the third-world generalissimo making grandiose claims was full of shit. This is what the Deciderator has done. In a he said/he said standoff, I genuinely don't know whether to believe the US or Mahmoud Ahmadinijad. Let THAT sink in for a sec. Course, given what's gone on in the last seven years, calling Bush a third-world generalissimo probably isn't that inaccurate.

Lastly...recession? Probably. Bush's reaction? Entirely (and tediously) predictable. For those of you who never click links AND have the IQ of a lump of granite, the prescription is....(drum roll please)...TAX CUTS! Ta Da.

The Wee Pedant Has Landed

The wee one herself:

The lovely and (obviously) talented Mrs. Pedant spent about 15 hours in labor, most of it spent NOT swearing like a longshoreman. I leave the balance of the time to your no doubt fertile imaginations.

So You Say This Is (War On) Christmas...

Let's start with this. As an Ex-military guy, if you say "War On..." I feel that I need to see bodies. If you can't show me the bodies, you can't call it a war. The "War on Drugs" at least qualifies due in no small part to trigger happy cops. The "War On Christmas"...unless there has been a rash of drive-bys on Mall Santas that has gone mysteriously unreported...not so much.

So, as Rogers points on in the excellent post I Saw You Looking At Agnosticism's Ass, Christianity and Christians have been acting awfully needy lately. Co-dependant clingy needy. "Girlfriend you're really starting to think about dumping, if only because of all the neediness," needy.

Now, and work with me here, EVERY major candidate for President and the vast, vast majority of the MINOR ones...the ones who can say whatever the fuck pops into their pointy little heads because it just doesn't matter (I'm looking at you, Ron "Fiat Money" Paul)...spend a considerable amount of time dry humping an altar somewhere hoping that a photographer will come by and take a picture of them fellating the Jesus on a Cross so that they can establish their "Good Christian" bona fides. Somehow, I just don't think your average Atlanta-area Megachurch-goer is in all that much danger of having the place raided by preatorians and getting their asses thrown into the gladiatorial pits.

So why "War On Christmas"? Well, we can start with the rise of Faux News, who needed to fill 24 hours a day with conservative friendly drool. Telling people that they're wonderful because they hate taxes only lasts so long. A producer looking to hand red meat to the right wings can't help but notice that, first, despite the power they wield they LOVE to feel sorry for themselves, and second, a shitload of them self-identify as good Christian Churchgoers.

So once again, I have to sit here and listen to this self-righteous drivel from folks who reply to "Happy Holidays" with a pointed "Merry Christmas". Hey, asshole, if you wanted to SAY "Fuck You" at least have the balls to actually say it. I say Happy Holidays interchangeably with Merry Christmas (more on that later) for one reason ONLY. I am a LAZY asshole. "Happy Holidays" is just easier than "Merry Christmas, Happy Channukah, Happy New Year and a very festive crapload of minor holidays centered around the Winter Solstice for some suspicious reason."

Which leads me to why I, a notorious agnostic (what can I say, it's a really cute ass), have no problem with Merry Christmas. You want "war on christmas"? Here it comes. As far as I'm concerned "Christmas" is just the latest name for the Solstice Holiday, and any excuse to get together with family and eat myself round is a Good Thing (cf., Thanksgiving), but the lewt is bonus. Plus it's nice to be reminded that while there is two more months of snow and sleet and all other manner of white shit followed by a month of freaking mud and dirty slush, there will in fact be another summer (which is loaded with mosquitoes and insane humidity...I can be a little discontented...really I like Autumn, give me a good Harvest Festival any day of the week). You've gotten your crappy religion all over my tasty solstice celebration.

Everyone is kinda certain that Christmas is simply the heir of the Saturnalia and various other pagan festivals. Let me suggest something FAR MORE subversive:
Easter and Passover have their roots in pagan rebirth and renewal legends and celebrations. Christ is Dead, Christ Is Risen? The sparing of the Jews from Matt Damon...I mean the Angel of death? Pretty standard really. Judaism isn't even unique in it's insistence that there is only one god.

You want war? The central tenets of your faith are eminently predictable sequalae of preceding cultural beliefs.

Happy Holidays.

Huck YOU!

Via Kevin Drum I see that it turns out that the Deciderderator was using the Constitution for toilet paper MUCH earlier than previously thought. 9/11 wasn't the initiator of warrantless wiretapping so much as a wonderful post hoc pretext.

Ya know, I really should feel more betrayed by this this. But the Bush Administration has never failed to live down to my worst expectations and then some. If I didn't know better, I'd think it's all a vast performance art piece entitled, "You get the government your ignorant, logic hating ass deserves."

In fact, in the last few days I've been reading about increasing levels of, chagrin is too mild a word, let us say "pants wetting paroxysms" concerning Mike Huckabee. My personal favorite comes from John Cole's Balloon Juice, a right wing blog that has become a left wing blog because it turns out that a)Mr. Cole has some level of intellectual integrity and b)the Man really is out to fuck you up. He links to Andrew Sullivan, Ace of Spades (!) (the link is to Sullivan's link...I have SOME standards about how I pollute my eyeballs, thank you very much), Dan Riehl, Captain Ed, and of all people Peggy "Extreme Unctuousness" Noonan.

My favorite two bits:

I simply can not tell you how much I am enjoying this. The GOP has been pandering to these stupid bastards for years, and every time I pointed it out I was called “anti-Christian” or something or other. Those of us who saw what the party was becoming were told to shut up, that it was good politics.

Enjoy your new GOP, folks. And here is something else to think about- are the evangelicals going to support Romney or Giuliani if you do manage to trash Huckabee enough to secure the nomination for them? Will the eye for an eye crowd learn to forgive and forget? Have fun!

and:

Can schadenfreude be fatal?

God I hope not. Otherwise, I am SCREWED. Seriously, as others have said before me, THIS is what the Repubs have said they want for 30 fucking years. Whether they REALLY wanted it, or just claimed to want it so that they could continue to loot assets like Eva Peron really doesn't matter. They've made their bed. Their choice is to continue to date the two bag, coyote morning skank they've cultivated or pull their heads out of their asses and vote Dem.

Just To Set The Professor Off..

Because it's amusing when it happens. And because I'm an asshole.

Oh, NO, You Didn't Just SAY That

According to a Mitt Romney (you remember him, the Christian hating fanatical cultist, right?) spokesperson, "[Romney] continues to believe that this campaign should not be about questioning a candidate's faith. While it is fair to criticize an opponent's record or policy positions, it is out of bounds for one candidate to question another's personal faith."

Unless the candidate is a Democrat. In which case, his (or her) atheist, gay marriage, abortion permitting ass is fair game. After all, "Freedom Requires Faith."

And Oceania has always been at war with Eurasia.